NEW! update - The House from Hell

Well today i woke up feeling like crap in a doggy bag. For some reason i am now sick, I am wondering what may have caused this formality. I have also noticed that i have been losing weight at an alarming rate. I am not worried right now because i like the fact, but i feel in the near future i will have to take it as a concern. I think i will eat more healthy food, i assume that this will be a problem though, as you all know i do work at the well know establishment, McDonald's. Cutting out this diet would be very good for my health, although, surprisingly i have fallen deeply in love with the double cheese burger. Enough of this nonsense talk. Back to my topic >>>>

My House, otherwise known as the house from hell.....

I will number all the problems that have gone wrong since day one

1. Phone jacks did not work in all rooms, we went over a week with out a phone in our wonderful house to then find out that it was not the problem of the jacks not working but only certain "one" worked. Now my mission was to find that jack. And where did we find it in the last room we checked ....Lindsay's room. We called mark to come and fix this problem (mark being our landlord) He connected all the jacks and left. When i came home to test out my new "JACK" to my dismay it was not working. A call so mark would fix this problem. Oh and guess what i heard on the line as a attempted to contact him, The operator! She was talking and saying that the line was not working, yet i could hear the ring and then mark answered "well hello mark, can you hear that lady talking loudly over us" he replies "yes, thats strange i guess i must come and fix it". well at least he is ontop of things. Problem Fixed

2. Just having to live without the phone was bad enough but there was also no internet or cable and it took a week and a half for cogeco to come and hook it up. Once internet was hooked up, a router needed to be purchased. Until then I was going to connect my computer with the Ethernet cable. With my luck the Ethernet jack did not function. This was found out the hard way (matt came over to hook it up for me and tested all the connections from his laptop. Thank the devil I have wireless! problem not fixed

3. Toilet, Yes the toilet is a piece of crap, the thing constantly runs and I can hear it loud and clear from my room. Nobody up stairs really notices, which sucks even more for me, because if I want it to stop I have to go upstairs and fix it myself. Again mark was called. He came and assessed the problem. Back the next day with a replacement part. Problem fixed.....Or so you think so. This toilet is evil I say. It still continues to act like it is broken, running again. Now the most evil deed it has done so far is over flow when nothing was there to clog it and drench our house in a sewage smell. I, mainly am stuck with the smell because im downstairs, and we all know the rules of gravity. Mark is called again. oh and you know what happened, the toilet is now not broken. Its perfectly fine. what a bitch.

4. Mould - in the bathroom since we have been there. Why was this not noticed before we moved in? I am not sure but again the problem will be fixed eventually!

5. Miranda hammered a nail into the pipe in the shower down stairs, well not my problem. but, did become mine once mark told me that i can no longer use my shower until the problem is fixed. Plumbers must be called and so on and so on. Problem fixed.

6. Ants, those dirty little bastards are crawling around our house like thy own the place. Where did they come from? have they always been a problem? Why were we not warned about this? So today i took it upon myself to correct this problem by buying any traps. Now i don't like killing wild life, but when it invades my home, i must kill it!Problem Fixed

7. Our stove is a piece of shit, its burners like to take turns in not working right. when you cook food its like playing Russian roulette. Problem not fixed

9. The fridge likes to cry a lot, or at least i think that why there is always water all around it. the problem has not been fixed but i highly doubt its much of a problem.

10. No hot water, you have to be fucking with me. My shower downstairs has no hot water, or at least thats what i thought. I found out that who ever installed the shower is a moron because the cold is HOT! and the hot is luck warm. Problem fixed.


i have been informed that scott must retire to his bed soon. I will commence later!!!

11. Those damn raccoons won't leave my garbage alone. Every night even if it is in the plastic garbage can thing that locks. They will ravage it until it is knocked over, and when this happens the lid pops off and what do you know garbage at their finger tips. I have now tied my garbage can to the fence, and tested its security. I think that they will need to naw through that rope to knock it down again, if this happens i have a plan "B"
Plan "B" - The peanut butter sandwich ...with rat poison in it. I think this my fix my problem for good. AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA, then i will put their bodies in a garbage bag and throw them in the lake to get rid of the evidence! Problem Fixed

12. Noise complaints from my next Door neighbor, suck it up you bitchs! thats all i have to say. they have woken me up pn many occasions in the morning, do i go over and yell at them for being to noisy, No. Problem not fixed

13. the window in the kitchen leeks

14. the carpet is nasty dirty from before we came here.

15. Broken rain gutters

Well for now that is all.